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There are a lot of stereotypes about the elderly being beyond sexuality and the need to feel attractive. But this could not be further from the truth.

Sexuality is a large part of who we are as people, and this doesn’t stop as we get older.

Reinforcing someone’s sexuality in their later years is very important. It is crucial to give women the option to feel pretty, and men to feel handsome. Make sure that they feel seductive and desirable. And allow them to become the silver foxes and vixens that they truly are.

However, in carer situations, the ability for older people to express themselves in these ways become limited. It is up to carers and family members to acknowledge the elderly as people who should have the opportunity to have a sexual identity.

WHY BEING SEXY IS IMPORTANT

Sexuality is critical for people to retain a positive sense of identity and self-value. It is a basic human need to feel good about ourselves. It is important to look and feel glamorous – to be a little bit sensuous.

Many elderly people are single. Some with partners who have passed on, and a large percentage of those entering aged care who do not have a partner. Many older Australians are seeking a romantic interest within their local community or care facility.

So a nice hair cut now and then, or a good shave, shows that they are still out there and looking for love. Ensure people have the option to put on nice jewelry. Buy a tailored outfit. Go shopping. Let them choose their own clothing for an expression of style.

Simple activities like this allow the elderly a better quality of life, a better sense of personal identity and healthier interpersonal relationships.

LET’S TALK ABOUT SEXUALITY

As odd as it sounds, it is important to talk to older people about their sex life and sexuality. Having an open communication about their wants and needs will help you address anything troubling them or look at things that they could be missing. It shows that you are respecting them. Recognise sex and sexuality as something meaningful and important in their lives.

Discuss it with other people – like friends and family – to normalise the conversation and create a greater awareness.

Some quick tips for talking with residents about sexiness and their sex lives:

• Start on general topics and process gently to specific subjects of sexuality
• Use open ended questions which encourage responses
• Be non-judgmental
• Respect responses
• Be receptive to clues

Yes. We do have to acknowledge that it will be a little strange at first. But starting these conversations like these will have a big impact on their everyday lives.

The ability for the elderly to present themselves sexually in their day-to-day life is an essential part of people’s identity but is often ignored.

If you want to read more about this topic, then I would recommend the following by HelloCare and Mental Health.org.